This is something I've never told anyone.

Five years ago this coming week, I woke up in a hotel room to totally naked. My head was fuzzy, but not hurting, and next to me was a note. It said "Thanks for the awesome night. Watched the video on your phone and we look amazing fucking. Hope one day to see you again N x".
I instantly thought I'd gotten off with some horny girl and rushed to look at my phone.

I stopped before I looked and saw two obviously used condoms strewn on the floor, and I tried my hardest to remember something, anything about the night before. All I could remember was booking into the hotel, which had been paid for by the company I then worked for.
Opening my phone, I clicked on what I knew to be a new video and was instantly gobsmacked.

There I was naked on the bed sucking on the cock of a much older man. Putting the phone down I couldn't believe what I was seeing, yet it was definitely me sucking on his cock, and I looked like I was enjoying it.
Too curious not to look, I picked the phone back up and continued to watch. Over the next twenty five minutes I watched as the man fucked my face, then spun me around with one hand as he held my phone. The phone was pit down briefly, then I saw his condom covered cock poke at my arsehole and slip inside my hole. Making all kinds of noises as he began to fuck me, I saw myself backing onto his cock and even heard myself say "Yeh, that's it fuck me hard like you did earlier".
Harder and faster he fucked me for some time until I cried out I was cumming. He then bucked deeper into me, the picture shot up to the ceiling and I heard him cry out as he'd obviously cum himself.
One more shot appeared of him pulling out of my arsehole, and I listened as I told him "Your cock feels so good".
The film ends and so did any doubt in my mind I'd been a willing gay partner. It was obvious he'd fucked me more than once, and it was also obvious I'd gone along with the man who was old enough to be my father.

Back at work the following week, my boss told me I'd been excellent in helping the company obtain an important contract. He also quietly said I should be expecting a large bonus for going through with what he'd suggested in the hotel bar. The thing is, I couldn't remember being in the hotel bar with my boss, let alone agreeing to anything sexual with a stranger.

What I do know now, is the man was a client and an influential one at that. He also I now know enjoys fuckung young men like myself, and enjoys them compliant.

I've since moved on from that company and have never spoken to anyone about my sexual hotel night. What I do know and understand about it all and myself, is I looked like I thoroughly enjoyed sucking cock and being fucked. And I've kept the footage which I sometimes watch and whack off to.

Now I have to decide if I'm going to maybe take another dip into gay sex. Or if that night, a night I simply cannot remember, is going to be my one and only gay sexual experience.
That's because the more I watch it all, the more aroused and needy I become.

My girlfriend wouldn't have to know, would she.