I won't go into details, but my husband and I got into a bad money situation. An opportunity came up where we could make some money if I had sex with this particular person. I did not want to do it. I have never been that kind of person. I'd never even been with anyone but my husband. But the money situation was bad, and he was espcially desperate and he pressured me to do it. Eventually I gave in.

He went with me to the hotel, which was not exactly a five star. He didn't go in the room with me, but promised to wait outside. He sent me in and I felt like such a fool. The guy was waiting, looking at me like I was an idiot while I stood there in confusion. Finally he rolled his eyes and told me to take off my pants. After staring at him in shock for a little longer, I did as he asked. Honestly, I just wanted it to be over as quickly and quietly as possible.

He was shaking his head at me like I was an idiot, and told me to go bend over the bed. Again, I obeyed, mentally freaking out but desperate to stay calm. While he was taking off his pants, I blurted, "I don't really want to do this."

He responded by saying that he wasn't paying me to talk. I wasn't wet at all, and he came up behind me and roughly shoved his entire dick straight up my pussy. I couldn't help crying out and he quickly silenced me with a hand over my mouth. "Just shut up and take it," he hissed in my ear.

He started thrusting and it hurt like hell. I started to cry and he kept on fucking me, all the while saying degrading things to me about how I was a whore and a piece of trash and I deserved what I was getting. I think that degrading me was a turn on for him.

Even though I didn't want it to happen, my body started to respond to the stimulus. I started getting wet, and he could feel it, and then he was telling me how I liked it and wanted it. His hand was over my mouth and I was still crying, but God help me, I was so turned on. I couldn't help it. I pushed back against him like an animal in heat and strained to open my legs wider. I had never been handled like that before. My husband had never just taken me like that.

He finally came hard, sucking hard on the back of my neck, purposely leaving a mark. He got off of me and I immediately pulled on my pants and charged out the door red faced and teary eyed. My husband stayed behind to collect the cash. We didn't talk about it all the way home, or all the way to the bank. It took days for that mark on my neck to fade, a reminder of what I had done. We never talked about any of it.

But I learned something about myself that I can't forget. There is a dark side to me that I didn't know I had. Sometimes I fantasize about that guy --- he essentially r****ed me. But it turned me on so much. And sometimes I think that if I ran into him again, I'd have sex with him if I got the chance.