My transition from a girl at home to a girl on my own took me through college, losing my lover and loneliness that can't be explained. I took a job at a large upscale department store the summer before college. I was assigned to the frilly lingerie section. Mostly older women who had money went there, you never saw some young college girl there. The department manager was a woman in her late forties who had been a real looker in her youth, I saw the pictures. She prided herself in helping women find the right size and she told me there was no way to know if the bra fit if you didn't squeeze the melons. Always, and she meant always, after you fit her you put your hands under her arms and took her boobs and made sure they were properly supported. And some women liked to get a massage while they were there trying on bras.

She showed me, she picked out a bra that she said was my size and had me take off my top and bra. She stood me bear breasted in front of the mirror and admired what I had, youth is fleeting she said, one day those nice boobs would be around my knees. She cupped my boobs and played with my nipples and said she was going to give me a massage. She held me tight against her, I could feel her boobs in my back, she used her hands and massaged my bare boobs while we looked in the mirror and she told me secrets of the trade, so many women liked to get her massage. If I learned how to massage boobs I would have a steady clientele of my own. She took off her top and bra and had me stand behind her and she took my hands and put them on her boobs and had me massage her. It was all so wrong and all so right, when she put her hands down my pants to feel if I was happy she laughed and kissed me.

She really did massage many of her clients, they came in every week and tried on bras. She said she got nice tips from them and would show me the money and she said that a lot of women liked to be happy too and some of them liked to be kissed in their happy place. She put me in in the dressing room a whole lot and massaged me and checked to see just how happy I was, she kissed my happy place and of course kissed my face and my boobs. She didn't just kiss me in the dressing room, she invited me to her apartment and kissed me there too. And she massaged me and I massaged her.

I went to college a changed girl from when I graduated from college. In college life was so college, friends came and went over the semester and some were closer than others, and one night I told a guy about my summer job and he got out of control and I wasn't a virgin anymore. He also kissed my happy place, except that he had the tool to make my happy place even happier. I liked that a lot. As I went through college I was really not so open, I had two boyfriends, my first one and another one that I met in my senior year. He went his way and I went my way after college.

I took a job working for a midsized school district in the suburbs and I met a teacher there and we agreed to live together to save money. She had all the wrong bras, I could tell. I bought a bra for her at Macy's and brought it home and forced her to try it on in front of me and I got behind her to adjust the straps and massage her boobs. She was not going to allow that but I was going to massage her boobs anyway and I grabbed her as tight as a I could and crammed my boobs into her and told her that I wasn't going to let go. We stood in front of the mirror while I massaged her boobs and I checked her happy place and then put her on her bed and undressed her and kissed her happy place, her boobs and her face. And then I went down on her until she got real happy.

Whatever it was inside of me came to the top and I didn't leave her alone and everyday I massaged her boobs before she put on her bra and we got on the bed and make our happy place feel good. I was at home waiting for her and she was late. No call, nothing. I had this real bad feeling and this policeman knocked on the door. I threw up. He told me that she had been rear-ended by a dump truck and had not survived. My world stopped. No one knew, no one so my morning for her was silent and lonely. As far as everyone was concerned I had lost a roommate and a friend and no one understood why I was so lost. I had to quit work, I just couldn't go back to the school where we taught and I got a job working in an office for less pay. I couldn't afford my apartment alone and had to give that up, maybe for the best and moved into a garage apartment that was owned by a widow in her late sixties.

I ended up confessing everything to her, I just couldn't stop and she listened quietly until I was so drained my head hurt. She told me that love is not something anyone of us understands and that losing your mate is a terrible thing. As we got to know each other I told her about my boss in the lingerie department and she laughed and said she could see how that would happen. You have to enjoy your body and why not enjoy it in a dressing room with a woman who knows how to massage your boobs and make you happy. She really helped me get back on center and move on. As far as I know she had a regular life, met a man and got married and had kids and lived her life with him, pretty boring.

I got invited by a couple of girls I knew from around to go with them to Todos Santos in Baja and she said to go along and enjoy my body, I needed to get laid by man or woman, but get laid and come back and tell her how it was. I had no desire for a man, although there plenty of willing me around, I talked to a lady I met while bathing in the pool and we got to talking and I felt the need and she got the message and we went up to her room and I got laid, by a woman not a man. I hadn't had an orgasm since my girlfriend died and when she got me there I let go and emptied myself. We played around for the next couple of days, she went home to her husband and her home and I returned to my life, much refreshed and ready to take on the world. I was grown up and on my own.

I have gained more respect for men, men can make your happy place very happy, it's just the cost of keeping them that makes it expensive emotionally. When I get to feeling lonely or just need to be hugged I find a girl for breast massage and to make our happy place happy. I have a girl who I am talking about living with, I am not sure that I could live everyday with a man. She has nice boobs, I need nice boobs, I love her boobs, her boobs fit in my hands and I can massage her the way I was taught. It's my little secret, I can always get a girl to get happy after a boob massage.