New to sex I went too far, overnight with a man, sex allnighter, gave up my virgin mouth, vagina and butt. For what? Love? Approval? Womanhood? Whatever it was I crossed the line, when he found out how old I was he took me home and apologized to my mother. Every week from that night I had to sit at the table and be an adult, I was never again a girl. Of course she kept tabs on me, no dating, no sex, to school and home, I had been grounded for life. When I turned seventeen I was given permission to go out with him, but home by ten. Punished for being human. I did not have sex again until my wedding night at nineteen, straight, missionary, no mouth, no butt, vaginal only. My mother's behavior I understand, his behavior I don't. I am not a saint, or a nun. I am a woman and I need him to make me his wife, just like he did that night.