I have been going to a therapist for a while now but I don't seem to get anything out of it. My problem is that I don't feel that I was born right. From the earliest time in my life I have always felt that I was born a boy. Sure there are lots of articles out there about this and there are some who believe that the thing to do is cut your tits off and have a dick attached and your vagina sewed shut and that will fix it. But that doesn't fix anything. I don't want to have a dick, I am already a boy.

I look in the mirror and I do not have a problem with what I see. The girl in the mirror does not make me feel bad, she doesn't get in the way of my life, frankly she is well proportioned and in a girl sort of way quite pretty. The girl in the mirror has never wanted to be sexual with another girl. But I suppose that everyone appreciates pretty girls so if I look at a pretty girl I am no different than anyone else looking at a pretty girl. The girl in the mirror is a pretty girl to me.

When I take the girl in the mirror shopping I want her to have the best, I want her to dress up, to be the prettiest girl around. I never dressed her up so she looked like some homeless creature, I dressed her up the nicest, softest, most elegant girl at school. For Christmas or for her birthday I always asked for the best makeup, best clothes and I ask my mother take her to buy pretty things to wear next to her skin. When I dress her in the morning I want her to look pretty, from the moment she steps out of the shower, with the prettiest of nice things against her skin, to the prettiest of clothes. She has always been a pretty girl and I like dressing her that way. If I am in love with a girl, it is her.

My boy life has always been a bit of a problem because no one takes me seriously as a boy, I feel ignored. It is hard, they see the girl in the mirror. As I tell my therapist I do not want a dick, get it. No dick. I do not want to fuck anyone. But that does not mean that I want a dick either, in that way. I don't want a dick close to me, I am not gay.

The girl in the mirror has several close friends, she has a nice social life, she makes good grades. It is maybe just one of those things that all of her friends are pretty girls who like being pretty girls. I don't want to be shallow about her but truthfully there are so many girls that are just not pretty or just don't want to be pretty and it is bad enough that she has to be around girls that aren't pretty.

So to get back to my therapist, he can't see what I see. Somehow things got screwed up and I have to take care of the girl in the mirror. He wants the girl in the mirror to be me. I love her, and I would never want to hurt her, I want her to have the nicest life possible. I take care of her, maybe spoil her. But I will be honest, the idea of having her close to another boy is just something I can't let her do.