Feeling guilty about my teen years. The gardener one day looked up my dress and pulled me to him. I was ten at the time. When he came I would go out and talk to him and he would ask to see what color panties I had on and I would lift my dress for him to see or open my pants and pulled them down for him to see. He showed me his penis, which he would rub it against my pussy. As I grew older he got more aggressive and he eventually fucked me in the garden shed when I was fourteen. After that he would send me away when I went out to see him and he told me not to behave that way, that's not how girls from my neighborhood behaved.

But I never got over the feeling of showing my panties. I wore dresses and skirts that were too short, I sat improperly with my legs open in public spaces, I lifted my feet under me on the sofa so that my panties were exposed, on one occasion I opened my pants and pushed my pants and panties down so that the boy could see my pubes, I went commando at the mall, I got braver and braver. And I felt guilty about it afterwards, hurting myself at home, pinching my nipples as hard as I could, I learned to pinch my clit really hard and when I found out I could use these big alligator clips my father had in his office I would clamp my nipples or my clit until I had tears in my eyes. But if I got the urge I would go into a restroom and take off my panties and walk around commando at the mall.

When I got pulled over by this man at the mall and he asked me if I wanted 'it' I let him fuck me in the service elevator. I went home and I really felt bad, I knew I had gone way over the line and I just quit cold turkey, I stopped flashing and went normal again. Now if I accidently flash I get flushed, considering that I would purposely let men see my naked pussy when I was a teen. I am married now and I have kids and I work as a translator for a hospital (I speak Spanish). I am sure to always cover my daughter's legs with her dress, have her keep her legs crossed and mostly I keep her in pants. She is only nine but I was around that age when I started so I am over sensitive to the issue.