So deep in the closet you can't see me. I come here and read the stories of men who get to suck cock or fuck with other men. That is my dream come true. All I do now is read and jack off, I have never gotten the nerve to actually suck a cock, but I dream about it and jack off.

I love seeing naked men, the gym is a place I can sometimes see naked men. To me it doesn't matter if they are fit with a six pack, or fat and ugly with a small cock. I like naked men. I went on a trip to Scandinavia and went to a sauna in the hotel and there was another naked man there. I masturbated all night.

I use to know this man who insisted on peeing outdoors. It never bothered me.

But the sad truth is that I have never been able to get close to a man and suck his cock. I don't know where to go or how to break the ice. I am 45 and I work for the same company I went to after college. I am not married because I am obviously not into women, I just don't have any feelings for them. I can honestly say that I have never had emotional feelings for a man either.

I have flagged a couple of websites where I can read gay stories or spend the evening viewing videos of stills of naked men. To be honest I get off reading stories more than I do seeing a picture of a naked cock, but I do like naked cock pictures, and I have developed a taste for pictures of naked assholes. Pretty gross in a way, but to just think of how he likes to get fucked turns me on. I could do that now more than ever. I could see myself with a man getting behind me and fucking me.

I would like that very much.