I sustained a compound fracture that had to be observed and rigged in an odd manner unknown to me, then raised off the bed. I was stuck in a hospital bed when they usually dump even abdominal surgeries after three days. It was extremely uncomfortable and they killed the pain with a drip of some kind. The only family I had who came to visit me was Margie, my young step sister who I met when my dad married her mother. At that time Margie was four and I helped raise her even though I was only a teen still in High School.

I used to cook for Margie and even bathe her, at first, teaching her how to bathe herself and how to use a back brush and so forth. Margie, then in High School, would bring her homework with her and do it, just staying with me. We loved each other as much as natural siblings would although we were unrelated. She would climb on the bed to hug me and we would lay there, close and together. When she began to kiss my neck and cheek I felt extremely uncomfortable and I told her so.

In her little teen voice, she said, "But, I love you more than life." I told her not to say such things. I felt myself responding, physically, against my psychological feelings. I hugged her tightly and told her that she must know that I love her as well. In the hospital that day was the first time it occurred to me that I had deep feelings for her. Yet, since I knew her from childhood in my own home, the feelings were conflicted. To date, I have avoided intimacy with Margie. I am posting this here to think about what is taking place but the last thing on my mind would be to pursue her selfishly.