So, I've spent endless nights trying to cure this curiousity about gay sex and well countless guys tried, and I always found a reason to back down, wether it was sending a pic or texting them instead of using the email, well it happened finally happened, decided not to be picky the other day replied to all the emails and turned out an older guy was super close..... I didn't realize how older and he agreed to a no talking stipulation so I go and hop in his vehicle knowing what's gonna happen so a quite akward drive to his home we go and we go in he leads me into a room where there's a pillow on the ground he says "strip and leaves the room I start to, I'm naked and he stands I front of the pillow as he returns taking off all his clothes he tells me to get on the pillow on my knees and at that point I feel like I have no choice I can't back down even with feelings of regret, I do as told and do so scared senseless his flaccid dick hang in front of me, I became shocked and couldn't move at all, he said to stick my tounge out and lick the tip, barely following directions I stick my tounge out and close my eyes when he tells me to open them, pressing his cock on my tounge when I heard "you might as well go all the way now that you put your tounge on the tip" at this point I messed up and jumped the gun and no longer wanted to do this, well to late doors locked and I'm naked on my knees, I felt I had no other choice but open my mouth as he rocked slowly his dick as getting hard and I'm crying cuz I'm sucking dick for the first time even though it's unwanted, he goes till it gets hard when he pats his bed I acted like I ignored and kept sucking him hoping he would cum before that, but no, he pats it again pulling his cock out of my mouth and starts pulling me up by my shoulders and there I am bent over a bed...whispering "no no no I don't want to no please I feel the lube slowly leak down my crack there I am bent over realizing this is it this is gonna happen wether I like it or not whe there it is I feel it, his tip ripping my anal cherry I scream and cry no so he pulls out and crushes me with his weight touching me and trying to relax me when I feel it again, his tips right on the hole and with a slow yet mighty thrust he was going in, and he did, slowly but surely fucking my ass well I'm pleading and whimpering "no don't pleas" he got deeper and deeper and well I asked him not to cum in me, well that back fired he kept going and going and said he was cumming and I was gonna tell him pull out so I can swallow when I said swallow I felt the deepest thrust and this cock swell inside me I thought it was over when he pinned me again and started to jack my cock off and I didn't know what to do or say there was cum dripping out of my ass when I feel it again, he put his cock back in me and started going harder and harder I cried in pain, he kept going and had no remorse when here it comes without touching myself my dick erupted I came so hard, and he was readying to again, and again in my ass, I layer there bent over in shame realizing what has been done and I can never take it back, he akwardly hugged me naked and that was that,