Straight Female / 30
I have been married just over 5 years now, and I do love my husband despite what I did about a year ago.
I was at a party, he was out of town, 2 guys were saying all the right things and I was in just the right frame of mind, and I ended up going to bed with them both at the same time.
For an entire night, I was involved in a 3some that up until that point was something I only thought about in my wildest dreams.
To have 4 hands touching me, two mouths kissing and sucking everywhere on me, and of course two cocks to play with at the same time, was beyond exciting.
One of the guys works with my husband, and he promised throughout the night that he would never say anything, and I do trust him on that. But he was the "bigger" man of the two guys, and by far a lot bigger than my husband, so that was a treat in itself.
It almost seemed natural to have one guy penetrating me, while I kept the other one hard inside of my mouth. The three of us joked about how maybe that is why a woman has two breasts - each guy got one! And honestly, my nipples are super sensitive to begin with, so to have them both sucked hard on at the same time, I could not stop squirming.
The fact that I was married, the fact that I was cheating with two men, none of that mattered. My body was being lit up like it never had been before, and I lost track of how many "rounds" I went with the guys. But I still wanted more.
The guilt came down on me hard a couple days later when my husband came home. The first time we had sex
after the 3some night, all I could think of was the 2 guys, the double pleasure, and how my husband's cock did not feel near as good as his coworker's cock did. I realized then that sex would never be the same between us, and that I would always need something "more".
My husband is very old fashioned, but a few months after I cheated, I got the nerve to suggest buying a nice-size toy for myself. At first my husband wondered if that meant he was not doing enough for me, but I made it sound like it would add TO our sex life, and not take anything away from it. So, my new toy eventually became an exciting addition to our sex life. I could at least pretend it was another man inside of me as I gave oral sex to my husband. But now I want the real thing. And I cannot stop thinking about it.
I hate to admit it, but one-on-one sex, even with my toy, is simply not exciting for me anymore. Every now and then I will get an email from my husband's coworker asking if I ever want to hang out with he and his friend again, and it is SO tempting. But - I don't want to cheat and have the guilt again.
How can I tell my husband that I would want another guy with us sometime? Or specifically his co-worker?
I literally lay awake at night wondering what I could possibly say to him that would make him agree to that.
I am sorry the 3some happened, I am sorry for cheating....but I cant take back what happened.
I also feel like I will explode if I don't have another experience like that.
I want my husband to be a part of it, rather than his coworker just setting it up for me again.
I don't know what to do.
I was at a party, he was out of town, 2 guys were saying all the right things and I was in just the right frame of mind, and I ended up going to bed with them both at the same time.
For an entire night, I was involved in a 3some that up until that point was something I only thought about in my wildest dreams.
To have 4 hands touching me, two mouths kissing and sucking everywhere on me, and of course two cocks to play with at the same time, was beyond exciting.
One of the guys works with my husband, and he promised throughout the night that he would never say anything, and I do trust him on that. But he was the "bigger" man of the two guys, and by far a lot bigger than my husband, so that was a treat in itself.
It almost seemed natural to have one guy penetrating me, while I kept the other one hard inside of my mouth. The three of us joked about how maybe that is why a woman has two breasts - each guy got one! And honestly, my nipples are super sensitive to begin with, so to have them both sucked hard on at the same time, I could not stop squirming.
The fact that I was married, the fact that I was cheating with two men, none of that mattered. My body was being lit up like it never had been before, and I lost track of how many "rounds" I went with the guys. But I still wanted more.
The guilt came down on me hard a couple days later when my husband came home. The first time we had sex
after the 3some night, all I could think of was the 2 guys, the double pleasure, and how my husband's cock did not feel near as good as his coworker's cock did. I realized then that sex would never be the same between us, and that I would always need something "more".
My husband is very old fashioned, but a few months after I cheated, I got the nerve to suggest buying a nice-size toy for myself. At first my husband wondered if that meant he was not doing enough for me, but I made it sound like it would add TO our sex life, and not take anything away from it. So, my new toy eventually became an exciting addition to our sex life. I could at least pretend it was another man inside of me as I gave oral sex to my husband. But now I want the real thing. And I cannot stop thinking about it.
I hate to admit it, but one-on-one sex, even with my toy, is simply not exciting for me anymore. Every now and then I will get an email from my husband's coworker asking if I ever want to hang out with he and his friend again, and it is SO tempting. But - I don't want to cheat and have the guilt again.
How can I tell my husband that I would want another guy with us sometime? Or specifically his co-worker?
I literally lay awake at night wondering what I could possibly say to him that would make him agree to that.
I am sorry the 3some happened, I am sorry for cheating....but I cant take back what happened.
I also feel like I will explode if I don't have another experience like that.
I want my husband to be a part of it, rather than his coworker just setting it up for me again.
I don't know what to do.
